gsw.network WELCOME TO THE BAY, BRAYDEN ZAMORA-KOWALSKI — Costa Rica’s most confusing export since pineapple on pizza; he went from running point in the Liga de Baloncesto de Barrio Escalante (San José) to teaching surf tourists how to fall politely in Jacó before deciding the NBA seemed like a normal next step. 📊 TOTALLY REAL, DEFINITELY-VERIFIED STATS - 21.4 PPG | 2.9 RPG | 9.3 APG | 1.1 SPG - 53.5% FG | 40.9% 3PT | 78.8% FT 🧋SPONSOR ALERT: China Basin’s newest “corporate partnership” is with Pier Pressure Boba (located near the pier that absolutely exists) — Brayden’s deal includes unlimited taro, one free lid per month, and a loyalty card that’s just a sticky note that says “trust me.” Follow @gsw.network for more signings that feel like they were approved during a Wi‑Fi outage.